spring is here and so is the shitty bowl

i noticed today that spring is here. i was tipped off while i was driving through salem county and the bugs were sticking to my windshield. i do a lot of driving and today was the first day that i noticed that the windshield is riddled with bug guts.
i'm sure we will get hit with a few days of frigid weather, but this is a start.

another thing i have noticed is that while i am on the phone with someone who is driving, i am constantly being told to hold on for a second. after about ten seconds they come back apologizing telling me that they are sorry but they just drove by a cop. listen people...the po po aren't going to turn around after going by you at sixty in the other direction while talking on their phone, just to give you a ticket. as a matter of the fact, i am still yet to hear of a person getting a ticket for talking on their phone.

shit, just jinxed myself, guess i'll get a ticket tomorrow.

and one last thing. now that i'm working in an office with a bunch of people, i am coming across this next situation more and more. i walk into the bathroom at work and lift the lid only to find a bunch of feces fragments floating in the bowl. it's simple people, whenever you drop a deuce, you wipe your ass, then flush. at this point, walk over to the sink, wash your hands and once you are done, check the turdlet for your poopie pieces. if they are there, flush the toilet again. be sure to use the hand that is holding the paper towel or you will have to wash again. and if you leave streaks, gather up some toilet paper throw it in the bowl and flush again, this should clean it up.

sorry for the toilet etiquette today, but it isn't fun taking a leak starring into a shitty bowl.